It's not bad! I enjoyed the art, it's very interesting and intriguing. The one problem I have is the lack of proper distinction between dialogue, action, and the names (for who is talking or doing the action). There are some words that are mixed in with the dialogue because of the quotation marks.
Example: "Why did you create me. she asks" (which is why it was confusing to see what is a dialogue or not)
Another thing is the names, those being Android and ??? being mixed with each other's dialogue. It would have been better to separate the dialogue and action up instead of making it read like a normal story if the following action doesn't have a name tag instead.
The story is quite interesting but I feel as though the mystery is tangled up with the problems of formatting the dialogue which makes it difficult to follow along. But aside from that, you do have a general grasp of what's going on.
It has some bumps to go through but the overall design and art is beautiful!
This one was very much still the beginning of learning to write for visual novels, not sure I'll come back to it any time soon. I wrote it like a novel and then reformatted it in visual novel format. Which explains most if not all the text and dialogue weirdness.
Glad you could still find enjoyment in it! Thank you again for your nice comment and overall thoughts!
Ah no wonder! It gave me a lot of novel vibes which I found enjoyable, I like the progression of how you became used to formatting text for visual novels (since I literally played through your vns apologies if I spammed you ":)) ) but I still found that despite the weirdness of the overall text, I enjoyed the overall theme and message conveyed!
Still, kudos for your development and improvement!
What an interesting story! The UI and the art looks so cool, I absolutely love what you did with the title screen considering the limitations! Great work!!
Impressive art! The UI especially has flair, the eyes following you in the main menu really got a start outta me. Great itch thumbnail, by the way.
I would suggest splitting up the descriptive/narration text and the actual character dialogue since it makes it easier to read but besides that, this is so cool! I'd love to see what other stylish games you make.
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It's not bad! I enjoyed the art, it's very interesting and intriguing. The one problem I have is the lack of proper distinction between dialogue, action, and the names (for who is talking or doing the action). There are some words that are mixed in with the dialogue because of the quotation marks.
Example: "Why did you create me. she asks" (which is why it was confusing to see what is a dialogue or not)
Another thing is the names, those being Android and ??? being mixed with each other's dialogue. It would have been better to separate the dialogue and action up instead of making it read like a normal story if the following action doesn't have a name tag instead.
The story is quite interesting but I feel as though the mystery is tangled up with the problems of formatting the dialogue which makes it difficult to follow along. But aside from that, you do have a general grasp of what's going on.
It has some bumps to go through but the overall design and art is beautiful!
This one was very much still the beginning of learning to write for visual novels, not sure I'll come back to it any time soon. I wrote it like a novel and then reformatted it in visual novel format. Which explains most if not all the text and dialogue weirdness.
Glad you could still find enjoyment in it! Thank you again for your nice comment and overall thoughts!
Ah no wonder! It gave me a lot of novel vibes which I found enjoyable, I like the progression of how you became used to formatting text for visual novels (since I literally played through your vns apologies if I spammed you ":)) ) but I still found that despite the weirdness of the overall text, I enjoyed the overall theme and message conveyed!
Still, kudos for your development and improvement!
No worries for the spam, your comments were very kind and insightful! They were a pleasure to read! Thank you so much, I appreciate that a lot☺️!
This was SO COOL!! Super interesting story, INCREDIBLE graphics and chilling ending <3 Amazing job!!
Thank you! Happy to hear you enjoyed it!!
What an interesting story! The UI and the art looks so cool, I absolutely love what you did with the title screen considering the limitations! Great work!!
Thank you! Glad you liked it!!
Impressive art! The UI especially has flair, the eyes following you in the main menu really got a start outta me. Great itch thumbnail, by the way.
I would suggest splitting up the descriptive/narration text and the actual character dialogue since it makes it easier to read but besides that, this is so cool! I'd love to see what other stylish games you make.
Thank you for playing:), I didn’t think of that I’ll try and find a solution for it!